How to Heal the Child Within
Time does not heal all wounds. Sometimes time further reveals the wounds that haven’t been attended to or dealt with. This was a truth I “fully” realized last year when I started therapy. Sometimes we can walk around unaware. We can truly be unaware of the pain, the baggage, and the wounds we’re carrying around. To be honest, I was carrying A LOT. A WHOOOOOLE LOT. I was walking around bleeding and not even realizing it. I now have the courage to say, I am a Grown Wounded Child (GWC). No that doesn’t make me less than, immature, or in need of sympathy. It simply makes me a child who is in need of the everlasting and relentless love of my Heavenly Father.
No matter how old we get in earthly years, we will never out-grow being a child to God. You see, we all have different stories and journeys. And with our unique stories come unique traumas. The thing about this life, is no one walks away scar or wound free. It’s simply the reality of living in a sin filled world with imperfect sinful people. Sometimes we get cut and it wasn’t even our fault. Sometimes we get hurt it was nothing we ever did to deserve it. And sometimes we’re hurting because we brought the pain to ourselves. However, what we must realize is this: We can never be in full control of all the wounds that happen to us, but we can choose to be in control of seeking the healing needed for our wounds. Healing is a choice. I’ll write that again. HEALING. IS. A. CHOICE. God does not force us into our healing. He graciously offers us healing through Him. However, it is up to us to choose to receive His help and healing. He won’t make us.
The first step to healing is realizing that we are in need of it. A conscious spiritual mind is a healthy mind. To live life unaware, or to choose to ignore pain, is detrimental to the life of our spirits and inner souls. The truth will set us FREE! No matter how painful that truth is, it still holds the key to our freedom. Unspoken hurt is like slowly sticking a knife in your side and waiting for yourself to bleed out. It’s a slow death. I have learned and am still learning to speak for that child within me. I have chosen to speak up for the little Ashley who was afraid, who was broken, who was confused, and who was disregarded. And I make a conscious effort to speak up for that little girl every single day of my life. That little girl still lives within me. And the little boy or little girl still lives within you. If we cannot speak and acknowledge that which has hurt us, we can never obtain true and lasting healing. Ignoring pain only elongates pain.
The second step to healing is realizing we are an active participant in our healing. “Faith without works is dead.”-James 2:17 God will give us the grace and strength we need but we have to be willing to allow Him to work with us, in us, and through us. Self-pity parties and blaming mama, daddy, sister, brother, and cousin for why we are the way we are, will only get us so far. Yes, it’s important to revisit our past, but we can’t stay there. We have to use what has happened to us in the past, to propel us forward into a better future. Dysfunction and trauma are real…REALER than ever! WE all have it and to be honest, we can’t really escape it. Don’t believe me? Just ask Adam, Eve, Cain and Abel. The fall of man was the start of family dysfunction (Genesis 3-4). BUT praise be to God, that even in the Garden of Eden, God already had a plan to redeem us from our sins (Genesis 3:15). That plan was to send His Son Jesus Christ to save us from our sins, to heal us, and make us whole again. (John 3:16-17) Oh, what a good good Heavenly Father God is!
Lastly, I want you to know that healing on this side of life is a journey not a destination. As long as we live on this earth, we will be forever healing from wounds. Some of the wounds may be old and some may be new. However, at the end of the day, we ALL will still be Grown Wounded Children just trying to find our way to our Eternal Heavenly Healing Home. If we were fully healed in every way on this side of life, why would there be a need for Heaven? If we had all the answers and could help ourselves, why would we need God? The truth of the matter is this: “Wounds can be blessings if we ALLOW them to.” Some of my greatest wounds have propelled me into deeper depths of intimacy with my Heavenly Father. If I would have never been hurt in those ways, I would have never known the amazing healing my Father God could bestow upon me.
God’s Son Jesus Christ paved the way for us. The bible says, “He was wounded for our transgressions. He was bruised for our iniquities. The chastisement for our peace was upon Him. And by HIS WOUNDS we are healed.” -Isaiah 53:5
Jesus became wounded so one day we could experience everlasting healing. He hung on that cross for our sins and for our brokenness. He bled. He was cut. He was wounded for you and me. As a result of his fatal wounds, he died, but on the third day he rose to never die again. When he rose, he unveiled the scars from his wounds (John 20:25-27) to further reveal this truth: “It is only through His Heavenly Father’s plan that there is healing for the sins and wounds of man. Wounds no matter how ugly and painful they might be…God can use to bring about everlasting redemptive healing. Healing comes through God. If we choose God, we choose to heal.”
Grown Wounded Child